Surrendering to the Surrender

I've always said I'm not a morning person. This doesn't mean I'm grumpy in the mornings, as some people are. I just don't typically enjoy getting up at the crack of dawn. But then again, once I'm up, I'm up and it is nice to be up when no one else is and have some time to yourself. This being said, I decided when setting my alarm last night to set it about 45 minutes earlier than usual (and told myself I was actually going to get up when it went off). So this morning when the alarm went off, I pressed the snooze button (which I used to NEVER do, I HATED it when Bekah pressed the snooze button in college) about three times and finally decided that I needed to drag myself out of bed and get in the shower.

I usually try to spend my prayer time in the morning and my time in the Word at night. However, I don't always get home at the same time. Uh yeah. I NEVER get home at the same time and when I do I'm usually totally exhausted and I need to get to bed pronto so I either cut it short or put it off. So I was thinking last night that I should read first thing in the morning. This will help in two areas of my life.

One, I will get my time in the Word first thing and it will start my day off on the right foot. Best foot forward.

Two, I will be getting to work earlier. This will mean a little more money (which will help alot right now) and because I will have started my day off right with the Lord I will have a better attitude on my way in the door Insanity (otherwise known as BSI) and will be better equipt to do my job and do it with a good attitude.

And speaking of God and jobs and the like... I need to get this off my chest as well.

Oh, but first. My time reading this morning was so enriching I can't hardly believe it. I mean I can, because it was. But GOD IS SO GOOD and it never ceases to amaze me. It really never does. It amazes me how the Spirit guides me to certain scriptures and leads me to exactly the places I need to be in the word. Like in Titus this morning... WOW. Yeah... EXACTLY what I needed. I would ask how He knows I needed it but that would be the DUMBEST question ever. He made me! And I'll come back to this rabbit trail in a minute... I'm in a rabbit trail sort of mood this morning...

*hop * hop*

I have HATED telling people where I work and what I do for months now because it makes me feel stupid. I have a degree right? I'm a smart person, right? I am capable of doing something significant, right? What am I doing here at this place doing menial crap for her, right? So, here's what I have decided as of this morning. I, as Hezekiah did the letter sent by Sennacherib in Isaiah 37:14 (have always loved this story) am laying myself before the LORD and asking him to give ear. I am giving myself to him. "Here I am, [take] me!" (Isaiah 6:8) I'm not going to be ashamed. I am no longer going to let Satan have that foothold, telling me that I'm stupid and I'm worthless because of my occupation at this point in time. I'm going to let God work. I'm going to be open and willing, not that I haven't been thus far, but I HAVE been guilty of wanting it to be my way in my time. And I need to confess that. I need to confess that.

So I'm laying myself down. Here I am... here I am, LORD.

AND IT FEELS GOOD!

Wow. God is moving and working and it's awesome. He is just SO AWESOME!!!!! And it's exciting. I know he'll use me where I am. He is using me. And He'll let me know what to do, where I'm supposed to be. He'll let me know. In His time.

And while I was driving to work I got to thinking about the seraphs in Isaiah who call to Him, "Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory." And isn't it though? I was standing in a small field last night, the charcoal colored sky, the wind gentle rustling the tall green grass... it was amazing. I just stood there and let God be. Just stood there soaking it in. Just me and God. And I know He was there cause He's in everything.



8Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under his wings. Day and night they never stop saying: "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come." Rev. 4


I long for your embrace
Every single day
To meet you in this place
And see you face to face

Will you show me?
Reveal yourself to me
Because of your mercy
I fall down on my knees

And I can feel your presence here with me
Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty
Caught up in the wonder of your touch
Here in this moment I surrender to your love

You're everywhere I go
I am not alone
You call me as your own
To know you and be known

You are holy
And I fall down on my knees

I can feel your presence here with me
Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty
Caught up in the wonder of your touch
Here in this moment I surrender to your love

I surrender to your grace
I surrender to the one who took my place

I can feel your presence here with me
Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty
Caught up in the wonder of your touch
Here in this moment I surrender

I can feel your presence here with me
Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty
Caught up in the wonder of your touch
Here in this moment I surrender to your love
~ Mercy Me


3His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 4Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.
5For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. 8For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.
2 Peter 1