The Distance

A fellow blogger has spurred me to write this... and while I have tried to keep it light lately cause my thoughts are usually weighted so (I have to have some relief somewhere...) I am inspired. Take heed: there may be a few rabbit trails along the way. So I hope you like rabbits.

I have felt, my entire life that I have been set apart. That I am called to something; chosen, even. I have understood from such a young age. Not just knowing the answers to questions, because I haven't always known, still don't. But seeing the bigger picture, the forest for the trees. I would go on youth trips and get letters weeks later from youth ministers saying how impressed they were... that they know people who were twice my age with less wisdom than me. I didn't ever think much of it really.

I used to wake up in middle school and cry every morning because I was still alive. I didn't want to be here... amidst the masses who didn't get it, who didn't appreciate or understand God. Not that I completely understood either, but at least I longed to. I would pray, o Lord, I would pray to be taken home. Finding true friends has always been a challenge and such work because it has always been such a frustration to me that people do not "get it." And disappointment gets old quickly... the heart can only take so much...

When I was baptised, I felt so clean. I remember that feeling. I remember the conviction, the urgency and the desire to tell the whole of the world about the good news I had received.

I am a wretch, LORD knows I'm a wretch. Why he ever wasted His time saving me is a conundrum but I'm glad he took me into His peace, His salvation. I cherish my redemption. Continually cleansed by the blood... what a thought, that something so crimson makes something so pristine?

Praise God.

With understanding, comes responsibility (as my brother and I often hold each other accountable to when we seem to be near the end of our ropes). So I will take on this Singles group and do my very best. After all, its all I can do. Even though by all rights I wasn't "supposed" to be in a singles group. God does have a great sense of humor doesn't He? He does work for the good... He does take our sin that separates and draws us nearer to him.

Holy, holy, holy is the LORD God Almighty, who was and is and is to come.

and His church said...